Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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