Say something about gay babies.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
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