Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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