I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
