discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Dude, this old lady messaged me on Facebook talking about her grandson and wanted to know shit about me. I'd almost call her a cougar except she looks like mashed potatoes that have come alive.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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