So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
