I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
Randomize