the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
