I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just shotgunned beers for America
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
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