You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
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