If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
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