I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
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