I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Randomize