why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
