Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
