Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
Randomize