Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
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If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
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Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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