you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
