i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
We need a shit load of segways right now
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
