Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
