so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Randomize
