Heybabeimwearingurpanties
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
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