My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Randomize