seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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