i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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