i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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