So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
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