How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
What a dumb baby whore.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Randomize
