Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
