part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Randomize
