you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Randomize
