So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
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