well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
Randomize