we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
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