I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize