do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Randomize
