i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Randomize
