C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
You brought string cheese to the strip club
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
