somebody snuck up and got me drunk
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
He better not be in your backpack
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Randomize
