...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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