Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Randomize