Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Randomize