plz talk dirty to me
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
