If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Randomize
