we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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