Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
We have started to decorate penises.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Randomize
