Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
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