Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
grandma shit on top of the toilet
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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