i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Randomize
