Texts From Last Night

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  (614): View more from Ohio

  There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.

  (614): View more from Ohio

  Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.

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  (614): There is a man walking 2 goats through the city. (614): Bonus: only one of them was on a leash. http://tfl.nu/ht0h
  Replies (27) Good night (3545) Bad night (577)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.

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  (610): No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends. http://tfl.nu/ox60
  Replies (72) Good night (10204) Bad night (829)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.

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  (850): My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated. http://tfl.nu/7uws
  Replies (14) Good night (1220) Bad night (4485)
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  (216): View more from Ohio

  I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.

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  (216): I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed. http://tfl.nu/uoo7
  Replies (15) Good night (691) Bad night (3021)
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  (949): View more from California

  Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life

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  (949): Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life http://tfl.nu/meh0
  Replies (12) Good night (4141) Bad night (1002)
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  (207): View more from Maine

  Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.

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  (207): Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend. http://tfl.nu/fufl
  Replies (13) Good night (5947) Bad night (1009)
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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?

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  (604): All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea? http://tfl.nu/njfe
  Replies (8) Good night (4160) Bad night (1222)
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  (506): View more from New Brunswick

  Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach

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  (506): Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach http://tfl.nu/g758
  Replies (14) Good night (849) Bad night (6856)
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  (954): View more from Florida

  oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?

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  (954): oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied? http://tfl.nu/xnft
  Replies (22) Good night (1937) Bad night (1827)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"

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  (513): You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea" http://tfl.nu/kx8t
  Replies (7) Good night (2076) Bad night (645)
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  (865): View more from Tennessee

  Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night

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  (865): Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night http://tfl.nu/c61e
  Replies (2) Good night (1612) Bad night (631)
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  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!

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  (262): You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?! http://tfl.nu/rmx8
  Replies (6) Good night (568) Bad night (359)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.

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  (303): Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super. http://tfl.nu/a5le
  Replies (1) Good night (542) Bad night (312)
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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.

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  (505): Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who. http://tfl.nu/ct81
  Replies (2) Good night (358) Bad night (720)
• Favorite

  (952): View more from Minnesota

  Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.

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  (952): Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win. http://tfl.nu/6dep
  Replies (0) Good night (397) Bad night (184)

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