she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
