She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
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Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
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Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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